I remember my body hitting the sand as I fell backwards. I remember making no move to get up. I remember the velvet of the midnight blue sky turning red. I remember the clouds forming faces laughing at me. I was on numb on a soft bed of sand. I was vulnerable. Yet I was free. Now I lived a free life, but I could never seek redemption inside my head. All my avenues of escape led me back to where I began, and which begrudgingly I learned to call my home.
Today the chaos has receded and the sweet smell of escape has overpowered me. It took hold of me and pushed me to the ground. Lightning coloured the sky for a few seconds. The world was turning. Life was changing. Reality became different and I took a step further than any other day. New perceptions were placed in my eyes, but the color was changing fast. I failed to catch nothing but a quick glimpse of what was in store for me. The shadows hung up the stars again and I was left alone on the sand by a thousand angels. I have never come this close to the light. I have never come so fucking close.
And then just as it had begun, it ended. Without warning everything was back to normal, back to plan, back to concept. I started to forget the little things that mattered. The little things. Only a matter of time till I forget how long just a little goes. I become what I hated once again. There is no cure for this. I am me again. A fucking monster.